Updates from Shmonty's Social Media 02/14/13:
@ThatChadRitter Sex must be hard for Hipsters. Knowing that they like something the rest of us do.
@Crystalgoesboom I don't have an alcohol "problem." I drink exactly the number of drinks it takes to make me a better person.
@jwoodham Don't play me, dawg. I'm not Candyland. I don't live in the Lollipop Woods. I don't hang out with Gloppy the Molasses Monster. Recognize.
@getta_grip_onIt If at first you can't spell succeed, try suck. It's less letters.
@jsteele3966 Played poker with tarot cards before. Got a full house and three people died.
@lizetagge Your lack of planning is not my emergency...
See you on the interwebs! -Shmonty