A gal looked at my beer belly last night and sarcastically said, "Is that Budweiser or Miller?"
I said, "There's a tap underneath, taste it and decide for yourself."
I was talking to a girl in the bar last night.
She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave, and got your hair cut, you'd look all right."
I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your hot friends over there."
I went to the bar last night and saw a fat chick dancing on a table.
I said to her, "Good legs."
The girl giggled and said with a smile, "Do you really think so."
I said "Definitely, most tables would have collapsed by now. "
I told a blond girl, in the bar, about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her breasts.
"Really" she said, "Go on then... try."
After about 30 seconds of fondling she began to lose patience.
"Come on, what day was I born"?
I said, “Yesterday."